Friday, February 4, 2011

Look What I Found Whilst Cleaning!

Boar Tusks!

Yup, boar tusks. :)

Now I didn't say wild boar tusks! One of these is just over an inch long, the other is just over an inch and one eighth. That's as close as I could get to an even trim. These come from the traumatic first tusks trimming of our pet pig William.

Here...take a look at William:

Of course that picture was taken when he was little and cute, and wasn't even THINKING about growing tusks. Here's what he looks like now:

He's not trying to help fix the car, he's trying to steal the blankie. Oooooo....blankie.....

Anyways, he's now huge, and his tusks grew mighty! So mighty, in fact, that one of them curved around and started poking him in his very own face!!

I told him to rotate sides while napping. As we all know, when you sleep on one tusk too bends back and pokes you in the face. Pigs just don't listen.

So...we had to trim them. It was a traumatic experience that involved knocking him over on his side (pigs are sturdy creatures, and very hard to knock over!) and having one person lay on him. Then another person has to hold his head. (For creatures with no necks, they can certainly wiggle their heads a lot!!) Then a third person has to get in there with nippers and carefully trim the tusks without hurting porcine or human. Roll over, repeat. Meanwhile, everybody goes deaf. You'd be amazed how much noise pigs can make when something is being done to them that they don't want done.

Afterward he was highly upset and spent much time pouting. I'd show you a picture, but all you'd see would be a pouty pig butt sticking out from under a hutch...with a very dejected tail hanging from it. We tried to give him an apple afterwards to cheer him up, but he felt that was inadequate compensation.

Yet he ate the apple.

So now I have this lovely memento of William's first tusks trimming. Since then we have gotten much better at it. Now we wait until he's asleep, sneak up, and nip off the tip of one as quickly as we can before running like hell. We only do this when they get to the pokey in the face point, tho, because otherwise they really don't bother us. He only uses them to rip open grocery bags and the occasional bag of dog food. He could use them to rip open people, too, but he prefers to beg for food and belly rubs.

Besides, I love the look people get on their faces when we grab him by the tusks, gently shake his head back and forth, and say "Whoosa good piggy? Huh? Whoosa good piggy?"